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Joce-lyn
All I yearn, is for the love of someone, coupled with the love from my sibling and parents. And to me, true love is when one sees an imperfect person perfectly. Which is what I see in you. The degree of the love that I have for you, I will learn from my past mistakes and make myself better for you. Just you. Then again, maybe I'm never the one. I'm not perfect, nor am I good in any sense.
Actions never coincide with words, and thoughts never coincide with either. That is, if you ever get past the first sentence.
im somewhere in between. condition isnt getting better, neither is it getting worse. shit. i feel like shit.
but at least im happy. haha... my work is still getting done, its getting out of my desk. got a whole shitload of work to do. and last week's work is still on the backlog. everything screwed up bad this week. records missing, record errors, many many among the most.
damn. i wish i can just put it all down and walk away. but hey, i know myself enough. i cant walk away. not just like that. i just cant. its not within me to do so, but it seems to be within all my suborndinates. sometimes i just ask myself why i work so fucking goddamned hard.
then i think. i work for myself. for my own satisfaction. hey, it works out. i like it this way. maybe im my own best friend. dammnit. boss, ever busy, still finds time to sit and talk with me. he talks, i listen. i understand. hes a good guy. pity he gets stepped over too.
good guys always finish last? nah. good guys never even make it to the damned finish line. they die long before they can even get there by others stampeding over them. he feels the same way, but no one can blame him. hes been at it more years than i have ever been.
but at least im happy. haha... my work is still getting done, its getting out of my desk. got a whole shitload of work to do. and last week's work is still on the backlog. everything screwed up bad this week. records missing, record errors, many many among the most.
damn. i wish i can just put it all down and walk away. but hey, i know myself enough. i cant walk away. not just like that. i just cant. its not within me to do so, but it seems to be within all my suborndinates. sometimes i just ask myself why i work so fucking goddamned hard.
then i think. i work for myself. for my own satisfaction. hey, it works out. i like it this way. maybe im my own best friend. dammnit. boss, ever busy, still finds time to sit and talk with me. he talks, i listen. i understand. hes a good guy. pity he gets stepped over too.
good guys always finish last? nah. good guys never even make it to the damned finish line. they die long before they can even get there by others stampeding over them. he feels the same way, but no one can blame him. hes been at it more years than i have ever been.
I messed this area @
21:39
21:39