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Joce-lyn
All I yearn, is for the love of someone, coupled with the love from my sibling and parents. And to me, true love is when one sees an imperfect person perfectly. Which is what I see in you. The degree of the love that I have for you, I will learn from my past mistakes and make myself better for you. Just you. Then again, maybe I'm never the one. I'm not perfect, nor am I good in any sense.
Actions never coincide with words, and thoughts never coincide with either. That is, if you ever get past the first sentence.
no one really can help me if i shoulder too much burden. i tell myself always the sacrifice is worth it, except for work. but i have no choice. the job needs to be done, but no one is doing it. maybe its an inbuilt character trait in me that believes in having the job done nicely and neatly. i dont know. but i do have the pride in handing up a piece of work that is done up just so, not in the fact for recognition as much in the fact of giving my best.
this is me, this is how i do my things. i have no need for recognition nor praise. but i need to see the satisfaction in a person's face when they go over my work and realise that it is my best that i have given them. not some sloppy shit that my subordinates can turn out and still live on with their lives. call it whatever you want, workaholic, passion or maybe even madness. i call it pride in my work.
day by day, im falling weaker. not in mental strength, but physically. im pushing my limits, but i dont care. i work late punishing hours, i go back on weekends to rush up on deadlines. this is madness, from what my boss tells me. its all i can do to ask a simple question. would you like me to hand up a piece of work that would not meet to your standards? that settled the argument. or so i think. maybe he could be wanting me to start working from home.
i dont know. if i collapse one day, i know its my own doing. i blame no one. im suffering from migraines almost 3 times per week, coughing daily and i have no idea what is coming up for me soon. come it may, i have no qualms. should i die, i die. im not too worried about myself, but rather for the people around me. would they be taken care of when im not around? will they be able to find someone else to lean against?
these are the questions that i pose myself. im not afraid of myself and my undoing. neither am i afraid of the future nor death. maybe im just mad. however, i am afraid for the rest of the people. i pray nowadays. funny thing is, i pray for God to take care of the people around me. and i pray for forgiveness. thats all. whatever happens, i am content with what i have and what this world has given me.
this is me, this is how i do my things. i have no need for recognition nor praise. but i need to see the satisfaction in a person's face when they go over my work and realise that it is my best that i have given them. not some sloppy shit that my subordinates can turn out and still live on with their lives. call it whatever you want, workaholic, passion or maybe even madness. i call it pride in my work.
day by day, im falling weaker. not in mental strength, but physically. im pushing my limits, but i dont care. i work late punishing hours, i go back on weekends to rush up on deadlines. this is madness, from what my boss tells me. its all i can do to ask a simple question. would you like me to hand up a piece of work that would not meet to your standards? that settled the argument. or so i think. maybe he could be wanting me to start working from home.
i dont know. if i collapse one day, i know its my own doing. i blame no one. im suffering from migraines almost 3 times per week, coughing daily and i have no idea what is coming up for me soon. come it may, i have no qualms. should i die, i die. im not too worried about myself, but rather for the people around me. would they be taken care of when im not around? will they be able to find someone else to lean against?
these are the questions that i pose myself. im not afraid of myself and my undoing. neither am i afraid of the future nor death. maybe im just mad. however, i am afraid for the rest of the people. i pray nowadays. funny thing is, i pray for God to take care of the people around me. and i pray for forgiveness. thats all. whatever happens, i am content with what i have and what this world has given me.
I messed this area @
01:45
01:45