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Joce-lyn
All I yearn, is for the love of someone, coupled with the love from my sibling and parents. And to me, true love is when one sees an imperfect person perfectly. Which is what I see in you. The degree of the love that I have for you, I will learn from my past mistakes and make myself better for you. Just you. Then again, maybe I'm never the one. I'm not perfect, nor am I good in any sense.
Actions never coincide with words, and thoughts never coincide with either. That is, if you ever get past the first sentence.
im fucking pissed off with work. ni nah bu. everything leave me to do. fucked up. i have to do so much already, and still im getting piled on with more work. because my colleagues just wont work hard at all.
FUCK!!!
your memories still haunt me. but i have no choice. i'll keep those memories of the times we shared. each and every one of them. even if i tell myself that i have moved on, i know that deep within my heart, i have not. i still care. love is very subjective. it doesnt depend on how much the other loves you, but how much you love and care for the person. i know i still hold the same feelings. i think from my heart, not my mind. even when i drive, i still think of the times that you spent beside me, holding my hand...
but who am i to say much? either way, without you, i tell myself to move on in my mind and to pursue my dreams instead. the next thing that makes me happy. driving long distances. with nothing much in the way to tie me down now, i start to move around and make my future what i envision it to be as a single person. if i am still with you, i will not even consider it at all. for i treasure family above all, but now, there is only MY family to worry for. not one that i will evantually create, as i thought it to be. after all, it was just an illusion right? rigggggghhhhhhhhhhtttttttttttttttt........................
im just deluding myself, but it works. i dont know how long this facade will last, but im playing it by ear now... if i run out of time on this, i will just have to think of a new facade to replace this one. its all in the mind isnt it? i'll just pretend im happy when im not, smiling when im hurt inside.
FUCK!!!
your memories still haunt me. but i have no choice. i'll keep those memories of the times we shared. each and every one of them. even if i tell myself that i have moved on, i know that deep within my heart, i have not. i still care. love is very subjective. it doesnt depend on how much the other loves you, but how much you love and care for the person. i know i still hold the same feelings. i think from my heart, not my mind. even when i drive, i still think of the times that you spent beside me, holding my hand...
but who am i to say much? either way, without you, i tell myself to move on in my mind and to pursue my dreams instead. the next thing that makes me happy. driving long distances. with nothing much in the way to tie me down now, i start to move around and make my future what i envision it to be as a single person. if i am still with you, i will not even consider it at all. for i treasure family above all, but now, there is only MY family to worry for. not one that i will evantually create, as i thought it to be. after all, it was just an illusion right? rigggggghhhhhhhhhhtttttttttttttttt........................
im just deluding myself, but it works. i dont know how long this facade will last, but im playing it by ear now... if i run out of time on this, i will just have to think of a new facade to replace this one. its all in the mind isnt it? i'll just pretend im happy when im not, smiling when im hurt inside.
I messed this area @
19:01
19:01