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Joce-lyn
All I yearn, is for the love of someone, coupled with the love from my sibling and parents. And to me, true love is when one sees an imperfect person perfectly. Which is what I see in you. The degree of the love that I have for you, I will learn from my past mistakes and make myself better for you. Just you. Then again, maybe I'm never the one. I'm not perfect, nor am I good in any sense.
Actions never coincide with words, and thoughts never coincide with either. That is, if you ever get past the first sentence.
drunk as usual... not overtly though... lol, guess after the exams are over, its time to enjoy. i took some time to compose this though. had problems focussing on the screen. vision is blurring. ahh, the feeling of alcohol hitting you.
well, PP paper sucks like shit, cos it was wayyyy toooooo hard... maybe cos i didnt study well enough, maybe i wasnt concentrating hard enough. careless mistakes, unconventional style of programming, thats what will kill me in the paper. o well, its over and its time to PARTY! thats why i got drunk again... lol.
anyways, im jamming as usual... mixing my tracks as insanely as i can, trying to forget about what i had conversed. need to forget it for the moment, to reflect and think again. im getting mixed feelings again, but thats all part of life isnt it?
but did you think i did not feel hurt? did you think i did not cry? did you think that i was immune to the harsh realities of your words? i now tell you, i am not all that you think i am. sheer willpower pushed thoughts pertaining to that into a corner of my brain, forcing myself to concentrate on my studies first. i told myself, i have to pick myself up from somewhere. and i need to try. even if it costs me my life, i'll die trying. in the hopes that i tried. you will come to know soon, what i truly think, as opposed to what i do.
and right now, i feel the need to crash. i have to care for my throat. considering the abuse the martell gave it. not to mention the cigarrettes... alcohol and nicotine, the 2 things that make you feel good, yet shorten your life at the same time.
well, PP paper sucks like shit, cos it was wayyyy toooooo hard... maybe cos i didnt study well enough, maybe i wasnt concentrating hard enough. careless mistakes, unconventional style of programming, thats what will kill me in the paper. o well, its over and its time to PARTY! thats why i got drunk again... lol.
anyways, im jamming as usual... mixing my tracks as insanely as i can, trying to forget about what i had conversed. need to forget it for the moment, to reflect and think again. im getting mixed feelings again, but thats all part of life isnt it?
but did you think i did not feel hurt? did you think i did not cry? did you think that i was immune to the harsh realities of your words? i now tell you, i am not all that you think i am. sheer willpower pushed thoughts pertaining to that into a corner of my brain, forcing myself to concentrate on my studies first. i told myself, i have to pick myself up from somewhere. and i need to try. even if it costs me my life, i'll die trying. in the hopes that i tried. you will come to know soon, what i truly think, as opposed to what i do.
and right now, i feel the need to crash. i have to care for my throat. considering the abuse the martell gave it. not to mention the cigarrettes... alcohol and nicotine, the 2 things that make you feel good, yet shorten your life at the same time.
I messed this area @
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