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Joce-lyn
All I yearn, is for the love of someone, coupled with the love from my sibling and parents. And to me, true love is when one sees an imperfect person perfectly. Which is what I see in you. The degree of the love that I have for you, I will learn from my past mistakes and make myself better for you. Just you. Then again, maybe I'm never the one. I'm not perfect, nor am I good in any sense.
Actions never coincide with words, and thoughts never coincide with either. That is, if you ever get past the first sentence.
shit happens. and today it was pure shit. haha, today was a public holiday, so damn freaking busy at the workplace. cannot believe it. go so many 'durians' fall all over the place and i picked up a few. lucky me...
today supposed to start work at 12 pm, so i tried to make it in before 12 la.. and best thing was, when i reached, the place was still locked! damn... so my colleague and me were like standing outside the shop and then both decided to go have a smoke. so i followed... anyway, whats a smoke now... since i've kinda given up all hope of living. smoke already, then shop still not yet open. basket... super sian...
anyway, shop open already, start work... work like shit for 2 hours before any sales came my way. shit la, leg stand until damn pain already. sell some microvault already, then start to get the ball rolling. wah, lagi best, the next customer was from yesterday i served like hell, then managed to close deal. super man... very happy already... but then, greedy also, so try some more to catch more sales. then i later damn lucky... got this guy call me over, ask me differences in the CD walkman.. say say a bit, then he say wanna buy one of them. then the fella next to him, just look at me and then point to one of the CD walkman and say he wants that one. WAH!!! my eyes open freaking big man! 2 deals drop on my head big time... haha, my colleague see already also face turn green. then also go past customers come back for other items... woohoo... im like on cloud nine. i closed another deal then when pack up shop that time, still got close another deal. wah... happy sia...
so anyway, today same old thing la, see her home then i slowly trudged home. im going crazy already. then also asked her on the bus whether she was willing to accept me back as her boyfriend if she could. she said needed some time. well, she can have all the time she wants. but im dying to know. and shes the only person i ever want really... i now see that it was her that i really feel for, despite all the differences we have. my life is so screwed. and i guess if i cant have her, im too hurt to even love again. coz my heart will always be hers.
its so complicated. and i really feel freaking stupid and suicidal... damnit.. getting those kind of feelings and thoughts again. real shit heap im in here. and freaking late. so im gonna sleep on my problems, again. most likely, cry myself to sleep. nite...
today supposed to start work at 12 pm, so i tried to make it in before 12 la.. and best thing was, when i reached, the place was still locked! damn... so my colleague and me were like standing outside the shop and then both decided to go have a smoke. so i followed... anyway, whats a smoke now... since i've kinda given up all hope of living. smoke already, then shop still not yet open. basket... super sian...
anyway, shop open already, start work... work like shit for 2 hours before any sales came my way. shit la, leg stand until damn pain already. sell some microvault already, then start to get the ball rolling. wah, lagi best, the next customer was from yesterday i served like hell, then managed to close deal. super man... very happy already... but then, greedy also, so try some more to catch more sales. then i later damn lucky... got this guy call me over, ask me differences in the CD walkman.. say say a bit, then he say wanna buy one of them. then the fella next to him, just look at me and then point to one of the CD walkman and say he wants that one. WAH!!! my eyes open freaking big man! 2 deals drop on my head big time... haha, my colleague see already also face turn green. then also go past customers come back for other items... woohoo... im like on cloud nine. i closed another deal then when pack up shop that time, still got close another deal. wah... happy sia...
so anyway, today same old thing la, see her home then i slowly trudged home. im going crazy already. then also asked her on the bus whether she was willing to accept me back as her boyfriend if she could. she said needed some time. well, she can have all the time she wants. but im dying to know. and shes the only person i ever want really... i now see that it was her that i really feel for, despite all the differences we have. my life is so screwed. and i guess if i cant have her, im too hurt to even love again. coz my heart will always be hers.
its so complicated. and i really feel freaking stupid and suicidal... damnit.. getting those kind of feelings and thoughts again. real shit heap im in here. and freaking late. so im gonna sleep on my problems, again. most likely, cry myself to sleep. nite...
I messed this area @
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